It’s not always easy to be forgiving. I know this in my personal and my professional life. This happens in family relationships and in workplaces. It happens with coworkers and competitors. Frustrations arise and feelings turn negative for CEO’s, technicians, business owners, and every other role. It can get to the point where you might even wish the worst for another person. However, this is a mistake. So much time and energy are wasted by holding a grudge.
Most of the time, the other person doesn’t even know you’re thinking about them. They’ve already moved on. There is an easy solution: Complete forgiveness. Challenging? Yes, but essential.
Why is forgiving someone so essential?
Consider these reasons:
Forgiving reduces anger. You can’t be angry with someone if you’ve genuinely forgiven them. You’ll have much less anger in your life if you can be more forgiving. Anger is a harmful emotion that rarely comes in handy in today’s world.
Forgiving reduces conflict. The inability to forgive is the cause of many conflicts. You’ll enjoy more peace and less strife in your life when you forgive easily.
Forgiving is healthier.Anger and stress are experienced more often, and at higher levels, by those that hold a grudge. You’ll live longer and enjoy better health just by forgiving others.
Forgiving wastes less time. Holding a grudge takes a lot of time and energy. All the time spent thinking negative thoughts about someone else could be better spent on your own life and goals. You’re giving someone else your time when you fail to forgive.
Forgiving allows you to move forward. Holding onto anger puts your life in a holding pattern. It’s hard to accomplish anything meaningful when your mind isn’t on your work. Anger involves focusing on the past. Everything in your life only happens in the present.
Forgiving clears your mind. When you fail to forgive someone, that person takes up a lot of space in your head. The person and the offending situation intrude on your thoughts and degrade your concentration. A clear mind and forgiveness go hand in hand.
Forgiving allows you to make peace with your past. We all have things from our past that could haunt us if we allow them to. When you forgive the people from your past, you’re able to focus on the present and the future. Sometimes, the person you most need to forgive is yourself.
Forgiving allows relationships to survive. Every relationship you have may become a source of pain at some point. As a result, forgiveness is an important part of all types of relationships. If you don’t want to spend your life alone, forgiveness is necessary.
Forgiving increases the odds of being forgiven. When you do something for someone else, you’re more likely to receive the same behavior in return. Forgive someone and you’re more likely to be forgiven.
Forgiving can be the best revenge. There are some people that will intentionally try to hurt you. These are the type of people that want to see you suffer. They want you to dislike them and hold a grudge. The best way to get back at someone like this is to just forgive them. It will drive them nuts.
Forgiving isn’t the same as forgetting. There are plenty of people you should forgive, but not allow the opportunity to hurt or betray you again. One good example is an abusive relationship. Forgiving doesn’t mean returning to a dangerous situation.
Be more forgiving and your life will be much easier and happier. Holding a grudge hurts you more than it does the other person. Remember, forgiveness can be the ultimate ‘revenge.’
– Mike Acker
President of ADVANCE